Overcoming the fear of marriage
Overcoming the fear of marriage
Building Strong Relationships And Marriage can be scary.
Day one in my marriage, my husband stepped out “quickly” to do some work and be back for breakfast. That was one of my very first tests in marriage: he did not return until about 5pm later that day!
I’ll admit, I was shocked! Just thinking about it sent a wave of fury through my body. Then the inevitable “Wait until he gets a piece of my mind!” thought raced through my mind.
Several years later, I am grateful I got the best support, a good dose of courage, and a daily mind renewal which all helped me walk through my first years in marriage.
As I look back over my life, I am pleasantly surprised to see I have raised four biological children, and several more in the ministry!
This has been my motivation for our weekly BSRM seminars, where I have endeavored to share the principles that have guided me on my journey.
Just when I thought I was settling down in my weekly seminar, the travels became frequent, while the requests for help increased steadily; I received from participants how-to questions about Building Strong Relationships And Marriages! I was thrilled to see people interacting with the principles I had shared and desired even more to drive them to success!
I’m not a seasoned wife by any stretch of the term, but I thought I would share what I learned during my experience, how I got over my fears and built my first years in marriage.
Overcoming the Fear
I have found that I’m not the only one who has experienced some fear in marriage. I was speaking to an older woman who has gleaned wisdom from building her own marriage and she shared how she overcame. The reason was partly because she was scared she had been mistaken to believe in marriage, and partly because she didn’t know how to handle the daily challenges she faced. A few weeks later during a conversation with a more experienced woman, she also confirmed that a lot of people are afraid of committing to marriage.
No one should live in fear of marriage, especially since we are in this generation where “knowledge abounds” and information is available at every turn. Whether you are single or married, male or female, educated or not, strong marriages remain fundamental to building strong families that leave lasting legacies. William James said in 1900 “The great use of a life, is to spend it for something that outlasts it.” It is important therefore that we seek to understand this all important institution.
We are blessed that the Bible shows us exactly how to get started.
“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” Matthew 11:28-30 The Message (MSG)
This blog will include how I learned to live freely and lightly in my marriage; how I got over that initial fear of marriage, and how I went about overcoming my daily challenges.
It is my prayer, that this blog will help at least one person feel more confident about building strong relationships and marriage.
I look forward to your feedback, and until my next post, this is Pastor Lydienne reminding you “YOU HAVE ALL IT TAKES TO MAKE YOUR MARRIAGE WORK!”